kaichoyce’s Twitter Archive

Most Recent 40 Tweets

Not including replies or retweets or mentions.

Tweets

1. ok everybody no more funny tweets from me til i hit 20k, this is self care
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 22 Mood +5 🙂
2. do i have a headache because i've been holding my breath all day or am i holding my breath because i have a headache 🥳
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood -4 🙁
3. british 🤝 porn whipped squirty orgasm topping cream
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood 0
4. i will never get veneers or close my gap cuz i am beautiful just as i am & also the Invisalign app shows i look weird as fuck with perfect teeth
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood 0
5. all i'm hearing is this lady wants to fuck you

   https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E63k_3xVcAMeOyS.jpg
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood -4 🙁
6. tyler the creator is proof cancel culture is not real, if you got canceled and stayed canceled it was cuz your art sucks
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood -4 🙁
7. yes i am into BDSM Beating the Damn Side of the blender with My palm to get the smoothie out
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood -2 🙁
8. YES i want to be invited YES i will get frustrated finding parking and go back home then pretend i never left
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood 0
9. jerseys are cosplay for jocks
   Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood 0
10. manatees are endangered because there are no womanatees around to keep them from doing stupid stuff
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood -3 🙁
11. Space travel combines my two favorite things, boredom and danger
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood 0
12. when my college emails asking for a donation

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E6zh8o_VgAQ35Jg.jpg
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood +2 🙂
13. help me get this tweet to a million likes so i can get a book deal for the story behind it
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood +4 🙂
14. what a coincidence that everyone who loves my comedy also has a great sense of humor
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 21 Mood +9 🙂
15. SSSSSSSSMOKIN

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E6y1ZaGVoAAShcp.jpg
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 20 Mood 0
16. my thighs are getting so muscular i had to switch from boxer briefs to briefs, it is officially hot kai summer
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 20 Mood 0
17. telling my kids this was g eazy and halsey @summerbrennan/1417649672919953410
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 20 Mood 0
18. they say you can get radiation sickness from space travel and for jeff bezos' sake i really hope that's true
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 20 Mood +2 🙂
19. JK Rowling: I received death threats after the statements i made about trans people Trans people: BITCH, ME TOO
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 20 Mood -9 🙁
20. this luxury apartment building that rents studio apartments for $2100 wants actors to be in their commercial for $150 lol

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E6wo7S6VkAYiHrj.jpg
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 20 Mood +5 🙂
21. do u ever have that dream where all ur teeth fall out but you have dental insurance so you're able to get them put back in
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 20 Mood +1 🙂
22. if a ghost serve me breakfast in bed we fucking @TheAndrewNadeau/1417158894443503627
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 19 Mood -5 🙁
23. sorry i'm late, letterkenny is amazing
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 19 Mood +3 🙂
24. won't rest until i receive credit on urban dictionary for coining the word assclown in 2002
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 19 Mood 0
25. sometimes academics get comedy right

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E6s1W4PVoAgsaAN.jpg
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 19 Mood +1 🙂
26. so weird that hairy pussies are considered a fetish, like shhhh don't tell anyone i think adult women are sexy
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood +3 🙂
27. FIXED

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E6ozTlOUUAAYED6.jpg
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood 0
28. sir your neighborhood is haunted @briscoepark/1416891328147771392
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood -2 🙁
29. i tried a salt rim & all i got was a dehydrated asshole
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood -4 🙁
30. normalize having two twin beds pushed together as a couple
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood 0
31. a little free library but for drugs
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood +1 🙂
32. hell is a tweet of a screenshot of a tiktok that was stolen from a tweet
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood -6 🙁
33. flamin hot cheetos are named after the working conditions in the frito lay factory
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood 0
34. why is weho called boystown when los mangeles was right there
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood 0
35. hiring a private investigator to find out who the fuck left MILD taco bell sauce packets in my kitchen
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood -4 🙁
36. YOU SHOULD BE DISQUALIFIED FROM THE COOKING COMPETITION IF THE MAIN INGREDIENT IS BEETS & YOU TALK ABOUT WINNING WITHOUT USING EVEN ONE PUN
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood +2 🙂
37. how dumb do i sound saying i like soda music @stefondiggs/1416883718971592711
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood -1 🙁
38. made myself a cardboard phone that collapses whenever i try to open twitter
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood -2 🙁
39. a halo top is when you get fucked by an angel
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood -2 🙁
40. 🎶 so no one told you life was gonna be this way 🎶

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/E6nsbx6VIAAFT2A.jpg
    Permalink On twitter.com 2021 Jul 18 Mood +3 🙂